A Post About the Fear of Failure
I feel naked. In a lot of ways with the blog, I feel like I’m standing in a room, by myself completely naked, waiting for people to point and laugh. This week I’ve tried 2 new things on the blog which means I’m opening myself up to criticism and rejection and for this people pleaser, that’s hard. I’ve been feeling this way a lot lately.
Let me set the scene for this week.
I have a girlfriend who got disappointing work news. She presented a personal dream to someone who had the ability to make it come true and was turned down. UGH, such a crappy feeling for sure. I told her, as you’d tell your friends, that something better was on the way. I told her she has so much to offer that the door that would open for her would blow her mind. The sadness that comes with rejection is real.
I have another friend who started a fantastic business. It’s taken off in a way that I often watch it from afar and think, “holy crap, people love her!”
She’s scared to death of putting herself out there and for the “no” that she’ll hear that inevitably comes with opening yourself up and expanding your brand. I had a similar conversation with her that I had with the friend who received rejection this week. I told her how fast her brand was growing, that she had great things to offer and that yes, she probably would have some rejection when she started growing the brand but that the right people would support her and everything would fall into place.
I realized among all this advice I was giving out that really, the one who needs to hear those things is me. Earlier this year I was encouraged by another blogger friend to start cold-reaching out to bigger companies that I love. I was either completely ignored or told “no” by 90% of them and let me tell you, it felt SUPER crappy. Actually, it still does. In my mind, there’s someone in a big office in NY or LA, looking at my Instagram account and laughing. YES, THAT IS RIDICULOUS but it’s the scenario I have in my head. So the truth is, I haven’t reached out to companies since February. I’m so scared of another rejection. I’m scared of standing vulnerable in a room alone, waiting for people to judge me.
Here’s the thing about hiding from failure…when we don’t let ourselves be vulnerable, we aren't giving people a chance to support us. Sure, you’re less likely to face rejection, but you’re also missing out on a crowd of people that could be cheering you on. So about that room, where you’re standing alone and vulnerable…what if we change the thought from “they’re coming here to judge me” to “they’re coming here to root for me”?
Feel the fear of being vulnerable and GO FOR IT. You'll never regret chances you took on something you believed in but you may regret wondering what would have happened if you went for it. Believe in the power of yourself and what you have to offer. Throw yourself out there, eat dirt a few times and realize how much stronger you are after. What you have won't be for everyone but it will be for someone.